Incapacitated Glob

Over dinner:

Luke: Do you have to take all that math and science in college if you don't want to be like an astrophysicist?

Me: You have to take some math and science, depending on your major, to fulfill gen ed requirements.

Ma: You're so good at science, Luke. What DO you want to do when you get out of school?

Luke: I want to be a writer. I want to write.

Me: Great!

Ma: WITH ALL THAT BRAIN POWER? YOU'RE SOOOOO SMART! AND YOU WANT TO BE A...(gasping for breath) WRITER?

Me: Gee, thanks!

Ma: I didn't mean it that way. You're smart too.

Me: [laughing hysterically, kicking Luke under the table]

Ma: WHY would you want to write when you're so smart?

Me: I'm smart, and I'm a writer!

Ma: Yes, you're smart too, but Luke is SUPER smart.

[Me, trying not to be too EXTREMELY INSULTED!]

Luke: Mom's a writer, and she's in grad school, and I'm writing a science fiction trilogy. I want to write for a living.

Me: That's not easy, but God bless you. Do what makes you happy.

Ma: Do what will make you money.

Luke: I don't care about money.

Me: You mean, you don't want to be Neil deGrasse Tyson?

Luke: No, but you know he's right about everything.

Me: Pretty much. Don't forget to DVR "Cosmos." 

[cut scene]

JESUS H. CHRIST! WHAT KIND OF INCAPACITATED GLOB DOES SHE THINK I AM????