"You Must Be Able To Satisfy..."

As most of you know, I'm feverishly looking for a full-time job. A jobby-job with all the requisite bells and whistles like health insurance, a 401k, preferably not in a tan or steel blue-colored cubicle. But not a job where I just go and plug away for 8 hours a day like a drone, and not one of the craptastic jobs for which I've recently interviewed where they think it's acceptable to pay a 36-year old with a decade and a half of vital, relative, challenging experience the paltry wage of $8.00 an hour. Color me choosy, but that's not being unrealistic.

While I would not ideally work again as an administrative assistant (my experience is more on the executive assistant pay scale/level), I'm certainly not averse to submitting a resume for such work if the gig is worthwhile, the pay is do-able and I can still write in my leisure time. Picking around myspace this afternoon, one of he jobs posted was for GE, the folks who claim to "bring good things to life." You know, one of those monopolizing conglomerates at which I would most likely swing my aforementioned (and still patented) Fist Full of Blue Collar Whoop-Ass.

Their want ad for an administrative assistant was pretty dull and uninteresting, seeking not the brightest "bulb" in the GE organization (one of the job prerequisites was a high school diploma or G.E.D.). The final requirement in their ad, however, was listed in bold all-caps. That must mean it's crucially important, yes/no?

"YOU MUST BE ABLE TO SATISFY THE REQUIREMENTS OF SECTION 19 OF THE FEDERAL DEPOSIT INSURANCE ACT."

Well, duh! Who doesn't? I think I satisfied that the last time I got my tires rotated. For shits and giggles, I Googled whatever the fuck it is, and should you care to peruse it at your leisure (like say, for example, you're incarcerated for money laundering for the next 50 years and need to build an appeal), it can be found at: http://www.fdic.gov/regulations/laws/rules/1000-2100.html