To my Christian friends, loved ones and readers, Christ is Risen! He is Risen Indeed! Hallelujah!
Everyone have a blessed day celebrating the greatest story ever told, with the world's most predictable outcome which strikes Westerners as way more plausible than the myth of a seven-headed horse or God in the form of an elephant. Glory! Praise! Honor!
To my non-Christian friends: I know it sucks, but Target is still probably open, and tomorrow, all the candy will be 50% off.
In the Department of Heavenly Miracles, God bestowed upon me 2 new giant zits, my mom only ripped me 3 new assholes in the span of about an hour and a half, & in a story upon which I'll have to expound when I'm not as pressed for time, Guy Friend barely squeaked by unscathed from my wrath with his balls intact.
Scratch that, Ma just added asshole #4.
2 comments:
Miss Thang,
One hates to laugh at your misfortunes -- but this ranks as the Number One funniest Easter post ever. Totally loved the illustration. Where, exactly, do you come up with this stuff??
Alleluia! He is risen, indeed!
Miss Thang II
Oh, come on now, Miss Thang II. If I gave away all of my trade secrets, no one would stumble upon my blog in order to be deeply but randomly offended!
I'm happy the graphic made you smile. We're lucky Jesus Himself has such a good sense of humor.
If only the assholes that were ripped into me weren't quite so literal and hadn't continued for the duration of the entirety of the holiday.
Love, Miss Thang
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