tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.comments2023-06-28T09:20:57.213-05:00Rhythms from The Offbeat DrummerThe Offbeat Drummerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comBlogger1390125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-55067651982526806262020-03-29T14:32:06.391-05:002020-03-29T14:32:06.391-05:00A great example of Ringo's humility.A great example of Ringo's humility.Summit'sPeakhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12600468952186293340noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-64652287731315758212019-12-14T22:34:46.593-06:002019-12-14T22:34:46.593-06:00You weirdoYou weirdoThe Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-38491550778428712022019-05-08T18:06:31.565-05:002019-05-08T18:06:31.565-05:00Hi Andrea. I stumbled across your blog looking for...Hi Andrea. I stumbled across your blog looking for a patron saint of drummers. My son is being confirmed next year and is exploring. I myself am a convert to the Catholic faith and I misunderstood a lot of the basic tenets of the faith before my conversion. I'm sorry you had such an awkward interaction with the priest in the hospital. Perhaps he was flustered by recieving the wrong Information. Because Catholics believe the Eucharist is the actual body and blood of Christ it would have been a grave error for you to receive communion and indeed for him to have given it to you. As a Catholic, if I were to attend a service at another denomination's church as I often do with the girl's choir my daughter is part of I refrain from communion because they do not believe it is the true body and blood of Christ but a memorial of an event and even if the prayers are quite close there is not apostolic succession. If I were to partake it would in essence be stating I don't believe what I profess to believe. It isn't meant to be rude and alternately when Catholics deny other Christians communion it isn't meant to be a personal shunning they just don't believe it's the same thing and aren't in full communion with mother church. I hope I didn't drone on too long and now you know something that you didn't yesterday :) Peace and blessings to you!Michellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13408763508940520748noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-71879951362798878602017-01-02T01:16:43.237-06:002017-01-02T01:16:43.237-06:00What a beautiful memory. We all need to jump off t...What a beautiful memory. We all need to jump off that diving board and I think she makes a great pontKatenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-35969712058615349842015-09-05T22:04:29.980-05:002015-09-05T22:04:29.980-05:00Wendy, Thanks for your feedback and yes, please fe...Wendy, Thanks for your feedback and yes, please feel free to share this blog on Facebook, but please give me my copyright credit c Andrea Miklasz, www.theoffbeatdrummer.com. Be well! :)The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-62228390172462816612015-09-03T23:53:40.689-05:002015-09-03T23:53:40.689-05:00I love this. I'd like to share it on Facebook,...I love this. I'd like to share it on Facebook, if that's okay with you.Wendyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17777766801875607353noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-85418355990572661562015-07-21T18:28:54.396-05:002015-07-21T18:28:54.396-05:00Rich,
I'm sure your writing is magnificent......Rich,<br /><br />I'm sure your writing is magnificent....we came out of the same undergrad program and you at least have a masters in writing...I think...I would much rather have your career than mine. Wait, I don't have a career yet. I just write for leisure and sanity. Trying to help others, and tell the sordid story of my otherwise boring life. I really, really appreciate you taking the time to read my entry, hope you got something out of it, and good luck starting the dissertation. Catch up on Twitter and if you're looking for more specific blogs on topics, let me know and I'll point you in the right direction. It was good to hear from you and yes, we'll talk soon! :) The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-60001194879039563192015-07-19T12:24:17.701-05:002015-07-19T12:24:17.701-05:00Andrea,
I decided to start using Twitter yesterda...Andrea,<br /><br />I decided to start using Twitter yesterday, and found your wonderful entry on keeping a brave face. I am so sorry I did not get to it until now. You are a gifted writer, and you make me ashamed to call myself a writer. Thank you for writing this. I did read most of it despite being on the cusp of starting a dissertation.<br /><br />We need to talk. RichAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05584809640565272687noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-26427586841742883062015-04-10T09:36:38.672-05:002015-04-10T09:36:38.672-05:00You are Welcome, Andrea.
It was fun to find your...You are Welcome, Andrea. <br /><br />It was fun to find your blog and to see that others feel similarly about Chumplady. <br />WTFnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-81601090016979903662015-04-09T18:01:23.932-05:002015-04-09T18:01:23.932-05:00Hey, WTF?
You are SO right!!!
I kind of had forg...Hey, WTF?<br /><br />You are SO right!!!<br /><br />I kind of had forgotten about her with, you know, living my life and all. <br /><br />Yes, if you mistakenly happen to disagree with ANYTHING she or her minions say, she will delete your comments, block you and then talk shit about you for days. I was SO highly amused by this, I had to put it to print. Sometimes, it's fun to be insulted.<br /><br />I still think I should get t-shirts made that say, "Annie can fuck off!"<br /><br />Thank you SO much for your comment and insight.The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-84376305627356926662015-04-09T14:23:56.497-05:002015-04-09T14:23:56.497-05:00Chumplady is truly a nutter.
I mean seriously, s...Chumplady is truly a nutter. <br /><br />I mean seriously, she is still whining about her former husband or husbands or whatever, years after she is supposedly married to some nice guy who swears he will never cheat on her. <br /><br />Why is she still thinking about her ex's. <br /><br />BTW: Chumplady, has not had a book published. She SELF PUBLISHED a book. That's quite a distinction. Anyone can self publish. <br /><br />If you read the description from reviewers her book is simply a regurgitation of her blog posts. <br /><br />She could not even conjure anything new or funny to say in a book. She's just repeating her same old Shtick.....boooooooring. <br /><br />The woman has also been banned from a number of forums, so she regularly accuses people who post on her forum with an opinion that is not supportive or her own, as being a troll. <br /><br />IMO, she is projecting. <br /><br />The lady has some serious issues. <br /><br />IMO, She acts like a narcissist. But she may be borderline....you know lacks boundaries. But who knows. <br /><br />She also pretends to be helping her devotees, but she is really enabling them to remain focused on their ex and thus co-dependent on her blog. <br /><br />She is desperately trying to make a name for herself so she can earn more money. But she is failing at that. <br /><br />She calls herself Chumplady but the true chumps are the people who post on her blog. <br /><br />IMO, Chumplady is master manipulator of the weak minded. <br /><br />BTW: She always takes down intelligent posts that disagree with her. She can't stand it when someone points out how foolish she is. <br /><br />Anyway did you ever get a gander at her photographs. Chumplady ain't no looker. <br /><br />She is butt ugly. Poor lady.<br /><br />And the saddest part of all, is that if you suggest that her new hubby might cheat on her too, she goes wild. <br /><br />She insists he promised that he would never cheat. <br /><br />Huh!<br /><br />I predict divorce number three for the trollchumplady.WTFnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-88572725184073935202015-03-02T16:32:23.764-06:002015-03-02T16:32:23.764-06:00I just said on Facebook:
When I told (her) polit...I just said on Facebook: <br /><br />When I told (her) politely to please stop saying very venomous things to me, I told her she was hurting my feelings. She told me to "grow up," which totally invalidated the honesty of my heart. It doesn't matter if you're 5 or 50, we all have feelings, but I'm finding , as I get older, that not everybody is good at expressing their emotions or responding to others' emotions in a healthy way.<br />Mister Rogers has been on our minds lately because of the anniversary of his death, and much of his infinite wisdom has resurfaced on social media. He always advocated to children and adults alike that expressing your emotions honestly and openly was the right thing to do. The more we open our hearts to one another, the easier we mend our hearts and resolve conflicts. It's not automatic. It's a skill that takes practice and patience.<br />What a tremendous load it is to feel hurt by a best friend, who disregards your pain. One can only assume the other person is carrying far more pain which they cannot properly express. While I was knee-jerk reaction angered by her statements (who wouldn't be?), I am trying to be mindful (thanks to another friend's advice) that she, herself, has issues to resolve that I can't mend at the moment. So I'm giving her space and time. I guess my underlying point is that we all HAVE feelings, are entitled to have feelings, are entitled to express them, have them acknowledged and managed in a healthy way and hope that it leads to deeper understanding, compassion and love.The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-64125345665002287592015-03-02T11:27:53.893-06:002015-03-02T11:27:53.893-06:00I will ride it out and even though I said in my bl...I will ride it out and even though I said in my blog (rather harshly) negative things about her, it was my knee-jerk reaction to having my feelings deeply hurt by her words. I'm an easy target because I'm a safe target, and no matter what, when she's better, if she decides to be my best friend again, I will welcome her with compassion and forgiveness. I am concerned about her health and well-being both physically and mentally, sincerely. But I can't fix her. I can only love her from a distance.The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-47835510620516159132015-03-01T23:44:46.322-06:002015-03-01T23:44:46.322-06:00I read the whole exchange you sent me, and I vague...I read the whole exchange you sent me, and I vaguely remember when this type of thing happened before. I'm so sorry you seem to be the target of the rage when this "other her" unveils. But you're an easy target because you're her closest friend. You love each other, and despite her outbursts and nonsense, which, by the way, you can stop apologizing for because none of it was your fault, I would suggest you just ride it out and let her get straightened out. In the meantime, don't doubt yourself because of what she said about you. You absolutely aren't any of the traits she called you. I don't claim to know anything about the diagnoses you've come up with, but it's blatantly obvious that she needs some serious psychiatric care. And no, I'm not just offering you advice just to be polite.BMFnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-75447397786187089832015-03-01T18:56:33.098-06:002015-03-01T18:56:33.098-06:00I was reminded of an instance during which the sam...I was reminded of an instance during which the same pattern of behavior occurred many months, maybe even over a year ago, when she said something about "another side of her coming out," or implying that she had some other "type" of personality and that she was sorry I had to see that and apologized for her behavior during that episode. While she may believe right now that as a 3rd year psychology graduate student that I know "nothing" about psychology, I know enough to see that pattern as indicative of some type of schizo-effective or personality disorder, of which she's not been properly diagnosed and treated. That's very sad.The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-90457560603962568342015-03-01T15:13:23.617-06:002015-03-01T15:13:23.617-06:00I know who you're talking about and she can ha...I know who you're talking about and she can have all the intellect and brains and "talent" she claims to hold over you, but try to remember, if you really are feeling vindictive or angry, that you've got something more important and precious in your life that she'll never have, and you know what that is.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-27022229660115683082015-02-22T12:39:02.724-06:002015-02-22T12:39:02.724-06:00Annie,
I'm glad you found the blog useful and...Annie,<br /><br />I'm glad you found the blog useful and I hope it made you feel a little bit better that you're not alone in this. <br /><br />Love, AnnieThe Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-29775356987117422022015-02-22T09:47:38.608-06:002015-02-22T09:47:38.608-06:00Omg. Couldn't have said it any better myself. ...Omg. Couldn't have said it any better myself. I'm actually in a long depressive rut right now. Thx Annie from Annie. LolAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-56927257964045702332015-02-09T23:37:57.752-06:002015-02-09T23:37:57.752-06:00Thank you, KC. I've rehashed the accounts of m...Thank you, KC. I've rehashed the accounts of my rape so many times, it doesn't feel like courage anymore. It just feels like a part of my life I'm re-telling. Perhaps time has soothed some of that, but I must say after writing the blog, I had PTSD nightmares of the man who assaulted me. <br /><br />"Rape" is such a misunderstood and misused term in our culture. And no matter how you look at it, the rapist (if not arrested) comes out looking on top while the recipient of the abuse looks like the one who asked for it. That's not fair. <br /><br />For every million good men out there, there are a handful of scum. I happened to land with one. But I didn't let him silence my voice after the incidents occurred and yes, you're right. My honesty and frankness, while disturbing and vulgar, I believe, can help other victims of domestic violence feel less alone and more empowered. The one who assaults the survivor doesn't get away with all of the power. No way.<br /><br />I've been critiqued that perhaps this blog entry isn't something I would want a potential employer to see. Should I be ashamed of what happened to me? Should I have not been more graphic? If an employer (not that I'm looking for a job; I'm a grad student) were to see that I was raped, would that make me less employable? That I don't understand. Does it make me less of a person? No. It makes me stronger. <br /><br />To hell with what the internet thinks of my experience...no one was there when it was happening to me except for me and the person who abused me. I really thought I loved that guy, and our first couple of years together were great. Then it turned very, very ugly. I wish that upon no one and it further proves that you don't really know a person's true self until you're faced with the beasts inside of them. <br /><br />Does the experience make me soiled, not-dateable? Not wanted? Unattractive? I've struggled with this for years, and have finally come to the conclusion that it wasn't anything I did wrong. Anyone in the future who chooses to love me needs to accept my history and accept that I'm a human being who has feelings and scars. <br /><br />My attacker? Like I said in the Phil Spector piece before this one, I believe there's good deep down in everyone. While thankfully, this man is not remotely in my life anymore, except for nightmares, maybe he can wrangle the good in him before another woman endures what I did for way too long. Thanks again for reading my blog.The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-78604132736062784282015-02-09T23:19:36.087-06:002015-02-09T23:19:36.087-06:00Oh yes, you do have courage. By sharing your story...Oh yes, you do have courage. By sharing your story, you're making it possible for rape survivors to feel less alone. That's huge and I admire you for your honesty. People are terrified of the idea of rape. They have it stuck in their minds that men are supposed to be protectors, and they can't stand having that illusion stripped away. But if it isn't stripped away, we are in great danger. All the best to you.KChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17587905976811500791noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-11893660592030783252015-02-07T13:58:53.961-06:002015-02-07T13:58:53.961-06:00Dear Congress,
Unless you HAVE my uterus (which y... Dear Congress,<br /><br />Unless you HAVE my uterus (which you might, it's in a haz mat landfill somewhere), please stop telling me what I can and cannot do with cells that may or may not grow in it. Please don't tell women who make the difficult choice to have a rape/incest baby that it's a "beautiful thing," because every time she looks at that child, she'll be reminded of the torture through which she was put which resulted in that child being there in the first place and have to relive over and over again what happened to her. Don't tell her, "Oh, just put the baby up for adoption," because that's still 9 months of having to gestate a total frightening resentment which could've been totally avoided if an abortion was an early option. <br /><br />Thanks,<br />The Survivors.The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-4389915504779221192015-02-07T10:59:55.686-06:002015-02-07T10:59:55.686-06:00Maggie Jean, please do share it on Google+. My cas...Maggie Jean, please do share it on Google+. My case is NOT unusual. What is unusual is the level of victim blaming and shaming I'm receiving and still receiving on Twitter, still as of this morning. <br /><br />I went out on a limb and opened up wounds that gave me nightmares last night to tell my story again, which I thought I'd put way in my past, and I'm STILL being called a "coward." <br /><br />Absolutely nobody, not a single soul, could possibly understand what a rape victim goes through physically or psychologically long-term unless it happened to them. So yes, I'm getting defensive and angry. I was posting this blog and trying to get people to understand. But the ignorant are difficult to sway.The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-9800701297186705102015-02-07T09:16:26.647-06:002015-02-07T09:16:26.647-06:00I'd like to say your case is unusual, but I re...I'd like to say your case is unusual, but I really don't think it is considering my own experiences and the stories I hear from loved ones. <br /><br />I would so love to share this on Google+. This is an articulate and heartfelt post.<br /><br />Maggiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00903678715925613725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-67930761792417825672015-02-03T10:19:27.180-06:002015-02-03T10:19:27.180-06:00Thank you, Maggie Jean! I appreciate the nice comm...Thank you, Maggie Jean! I appreciate the nice comment. The whole situation got to be so absurd, one could only laugh at it at a certain point! We're expecting another 1-3" tonight into tomorrow. Grand.<br /><br />I was going to write another blog last night about the anniversary of the death of my father (which was yesterday), but I realized at the witching hour that I had a paper due today, so that had to take first priority. <br /><br />Stay tuned for more Annie fun!The Offbeat Drummerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18297496441624179505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8191306183209604345.post-66326573662655501802015-02-03T09:19:28.064-06:002015-02-03T09:19:28.064-06:00Hilarious. Only cause I've been through the sa...Hilarious. Only cause I've been through the same experience. Love your blog.Maggiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00903678715925613725noreply@blogger.com